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(As Presented by Lisa Bishop)
The past 2 years have thrown a lot of curve balls our way. I’m wondering what last year was like for you. What were some of the things you had hoped would happen but didn’t? What are some things you had hoped would not happen but did? And, how is your hope as this new year has gotten under way?
Webster’s dictionary definition of hope is: A desire of some good, accompanied with at least a slight expectation of obtaining it. Or an expectation or optimism for the future.
We’ve all been there, hoping for something. Maybe you have hoped for a new job, a relationship, a new home or a promotion, good news of a child after years of battling with infertility. Maybe you have hoped that your son or daughter would get their life on track or that a broken relationship would be restored. Perhaps you have hoped for healing of a disease or physical ailment for yourself or someone close to you.
I have had many hopes over the years. Some things I have hoped for came to fruition. Others didn’t. For years I hoped for marriage. I hoped that that special someone would notice me and choose me to be their wife. And along with marriage, I hoped one day to have kids. Today I am 52, single, never married and I don’t have children.
Almost eight years ago my dad unexpectedly fell ill. I hoped he would recover, but he didn’t.
For several years I had hoped that God would bring me a new job. The one I was in felt like a dead end and I wasn’t passionate about it. I experienced a stirring for a career that felt meaningful. It took seven years until a new job, one that was in alignment with my calling, came my way.
We all have expectations and longings. We all hope.
What do we do when what we hope for, what we long for, doesn’t happen? How will we act when things do not turn out the way that we want or not in our timing?
Hope is an important Christian virtue, it’s a standard of our Christian faith. And hope is essential especially as we seek to stay grounded in the midst of life’s challenges, losses and disappointments. Because let’s face it, life will have disappointments. So how do we maintain hope?
In Proverbs 13:12 King Solomon penned these words of wisdom: “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.”
When something we hope for is delayed it can cause despair and affliction. Unmet longing can make us heart sick. When was a time in your life that you experienced despair when something you hoped for did not come to fruition, was postponed or delayed?
In the second part of Proverbs 13:12 Solomon gives the antithesis of hope deferred when he says, “But a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” The tree of life represents the renewal of life.
When our hopes and desires are fulfilled, we are refreshed. When our prayers are answered, we are encouraged. When we obtain the good thing that we desire, our souls feel revived. Solomon reiterates the sentiment in Proverbs 13:19: “A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul.”
The reality is that dashed hopes can sicken the heart, and the higher the expectations, the greater the potential for despair. So what do we make of Solomon’s words on hope?
God created us to desire; he created us to have hope.
While receiving what we desire can be an excellent and fulfilling thing, we must not allow the pursuit of it, the fulfillment of it to become the ultimate. As followers of Jesus, we must know and believe that our ultimate hope is in him. Our hope is in the giver of all good things, not the good things themselves.
When we misplace our true hope and an unmet desire and expectation turns to hopelessness, we can become spiritually dried up and really vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks. We start believing lies about God and that is the beginning of a downward spiral. Think of a time when a prayer or something you asked of God was not answered in the way you wanted. What did you feel? How did you act? What were your thoughts about God?
It’s okay to feel disappointment. But the enemy wants us to experience despair, he tempts us to lose all hope. We see feelings of disappointment and even despair all throughout the book of Psalms.
Several times throughout his life King David lived in seasons of great danger and deprivation. He came face to face with losing his life several times at the hands of his enemies. In Psalm 22:1-2 King David cried out to God in gut wrenching honesty.
“God, my God! Why would you abandon me now? Why do you remain distant, refusing to answer my tearful cries in the day and my desperate cries for your help in the night? I can’t stop sobbing. Where are you, my God?” (TPT)
Sounds pretty hopeless doesn’t he? David has cried out to God and feels like God has abandoned him because God is not answering in the timing or in the way that David imagined. God feels distant.
Have you ever cried out to God? Have you ever felt that God was distant?
In the opening of David’s Psalm we see him in moments of true, raw desperation and then in the midst of his despair he pens the very next verses where 3-5 he says:
“Yet I know that you are most holy. You are God-Enthroned, the praise of Israel. Our fathers’ faith was in you— through the generations they trusted in you and you came through. Every time they cried out to you in their despair, you were faithful to deliver them; you didn’t disappoint them.” (TPT)
David remembers and declares the truth of who God is. David’s circumstances may seem hopeless but God is faithful. He is holy. He is the enthroned in a position of all authority and influence. God is trustworthy even when the chips are down. He always comes through. He is always faithful. He always delivers. He never disappoints. David gives us such a great example of how to respond when we are experiencing a feeling of despair, of hopelessness.
One thing I want to point out is that David, in his moments of great despair turned to God. He was honest with God. He brought all of his emotions to his Heavenly Father. It can be tempting to turn to other things when we feel hopeless. It can be tempting to try and ease the pain or to find temporary relief or pleasure in drugs, alcohol, sex, food.
It can be tempting to let bitterness and anger overtake us when we don’t get what we want or our longings go unfulfilled. In fact, there are so many people who have abandoned their faith in Jesus because they have not gotten what they wanted, prayed for and hoped for, or their life has not turned out the way they planned.
This is misplaced hope. Hope is not in the fulfillment of our earthly desires, but trust in the saving grace and character of Jesus Christ.
In the Old Testament, the word hope means to wait eagerly, to expect, ultimately to trust God. It’s used by Jeremiah when he addresses the Lord in Jeremiah 14:22, “Our hope is in you.” And the words of the Psalmist in Psalm 42:5, “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”
When you are experiencing disappointment or feel yourself headed down the road of despair, turn to God! Tell him everything you are thinking and feeling. God can handle it. His Word says that he already knows your thoughts before you think them and your words before they are even on your tongue. And he invites you to come to him. We would not have so many examples of people in the Bible that cried out to God if God was not intentionally giving us examples to follow.
And start to praise him. Start calling out and proclaiming the character of God. Even through your tears, declare his faithfulness from the top of your lungs. That will make the enemy flee.
I was in Africa a few months ago and in the three weeks I was there I visited villages in the bush that until a few years prior, the tribes of people had no access to medical care. They literally had to walk upwards of 20 to 40 miles to get any sort of medical attention. Sometimes they would put sick and dying people in wheelbarrows and take several day treks in hopes of proper care. They were without water walking days just to retrieve a few filthy and contaminated buckets. Until by the grace of God a friend of mine who runs a non-profit raised money to build a clinic and build a well.
In my time there I also visited a women’s prison. You cannot even imagine the deplorable conditions. The prisons in the US look like the Ritz Carlton in comparison. Imagine 110 women and two infants crammed into three small buildings with dirty mattresses side by side with no room to walk in between. And two bathrooms and showers to be shared by all. Most of their time spent in the blazing sun and heat out in open spaces when they were not in their sleeping quarters. The women were in three different colored uniforms depending on the level of their crimes. Pink for those who committed lesser crimes with lighter sentences, then orange and then white. The women in the white uniforms were labeled “condemned.” Literally that was the name they wore. Their crimes worthy of life sentences so when they were referred to they were literally called “the condemned ones.”
And yet when we visited these women in prison, they sang praise hymns for us! One of the women in white was the one that led a song of praise. I was stunned. I turned to one of the women with me and said, “How can they be praising and singing when they are in such conditions?” Based on the situation they found themselves in, things seemed hopeless. The woman looked back at me and said, “They are singing praises because they have hope.” That is what true hope is—their hope is in Jesus.
But that’s what true faith is; faith hopes even in the most dire circumstances.
How often do you—do I—lose hope based on the season or circumstances of our life? This isn’t a condemning question it is more of an invitation to notice.
Don’t be ashamed when your hope gets momentarily displaced. We are human and that will happen. The goal is to get into a habit of fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
Waiting and longing are opportunities to trust God and allow him to work in our hearts and strengthen our character: Romans 8:25 says, “But if we look forward to something we don’t yet have, we must wait patiently and confidently.”
We ought to see these times as opportunities to turn to God and depend on him in our weakness. Our unfulfilled desires and deferred hopes can lead us to rich encounters with our Savior: In Lamentations 3:25–26 we read “The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.” The Lord alone is the true fulfillment of our longings.
When hope deferred makes your heart sick, look to Jesus Christ. As the Psalmist declares in Psalm 39:7, “And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in You.” When we place our hope in Christ alone, we won’t be disappointed.
It can be very easy to lose hope and fall into despair when life does not go the way we planned. But let’s vow to stay steadfast in our faith, to encourage one another to be firmly loyal and constant; unswerving, fixed, and immovable.
And remember that hope comes from trust. Recount all of the ways God has been faithful. In fact, take some time over the next few days and start to write down all of the ways throughout the years God has provided for you. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to remember. It can be so easy to forget. Resist taking even the “smallest” of ways for granted because nothing God does is small. Remind yourself of the character of God. When we acknowledge God for who he is, when we praise him with hearts of gratitude, we can’t help but be hopeful.
The Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 15:13:
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.