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Most of us have enough respect for our bodies not to beat our heads against brick walls, right? And yet we may be inflicting suffering on ourselves in other ways that are even more harmful and foolish.

Yesterday we saw how bitterness is always self-inflicted suffering. The second one is self-pity. Have you had any pity parties lately? I’ve come to the conclusion that pity parties are pitiful! Why?

First, because almost always, pity parties cause you to waste time. I remember a time long ago when someone had hurt my feelings, and so I thought, “I’m not going to do anything tonight; I have a right to just do nothing and feel sorry for myself.” Then it dawned on me the enemy was trying to hinder me by tempting me to throw a pity party. That’s when I began to realize how pitiful pity parties are.

Not only do pity parties waste your time, but they also waste your energy. Self-pity drains you. You spend a lot of emotional energy when you are feeling sorry for yourself. That means you don’t have energy for other things that are important.

Another result of self-pity is it affects your performance. You slow down, you lose motivation, you do your work halfheartedly—or, maybe you just quit!

If you’re tired of the self-inflicted suffering of pity parties, here are some suggestions:

Change your attitude about pity parties.

Ask God to give you holy anger about pity parties, to see them as he sees them, and to get sick and tired of feeling sorry for yourself.

Refuse to think about the bad reports!

In Philippians 4:8 we are told to think about things that are of a good report. Usually, when we are having a pity party, we are thinking about some bad report. It has helped me greatly to tell myself, “Mary, stop thinking about the bad reports. Think about some good reports.”

Think about Jesus and all he endured.

Hebrews 12:2 says let us fix our eyes on Jesus… By a set of your will, stop thinking about poor me, and think about Jesus—fix your eyes on him. Think about how he suffered for you, and you will be embarrassed to feel sorry for yourself.