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I’ve been challenging you to think of yourself as a host or hostess on your job and elsewhere, in order to connect with people better. To initiate conversations, volunteer help, keep your antenna up for anyone who needs a word of encouragement. This is how we show Christ’s love in a world that is starving for kindness and compassion.
I remember someone giving a message challenging us to “leave it better than you found it.” Just imagine how much nicer our worlds would be if we all practiced that regularly—leaving everything better than we found it.
Let’s take that principle and apply it to our relationships. What if our goal was to make certain every relationship we have of any significant length—like fifteen minutes or more—was to leave that person better than we found him or her? To do something for that person would add value to their lives. It might be a word of advice that we take time to share, or a listening ear, or a book we could recommend, or an invitation to lunch.
You know, people don’t remember so much what we do or how well we do it, but they do remember how we made them feel. Have you ever thought about how you make other people feel? I’m sure you’ve thought about how other people make you feel. But reverse that and ask yourself, “How do I make other people feel?”
Some people make us feel insignificant. Others intimidate us. Some people make us feel like failures. No doubt you can think of people in your life who give you those kinds of negative feelings. They may not intend to give off those vibes, but something in their manner or the way they treat you gives you that impression. Stop and ask yourself: Do I do that to others?
I have learned I can send negative messages to others because of my tendency to be very project oriented and very focused on getting a job done. In the process, if I’m not careful, I can miss opportunities to recognize people along the way and send them an unintended message that they aren’t important to me. I’m working hard to change those bad habits, but I have to be very intentional about it and remember to catch myself and connect with all those people.
What kind of messages do you send to others? Do they sense you are a caring person; do you exude an attitude of acceptance and warmth? Obviously, I’m aware we can’t please everyone, and people can choose to misinterpret us unfairly. But we also have a responsibility, as Paul wrote to the Corinthians, to take pains to do what is right, not only in the sight of God, but also in the sight of men (2 Corinthians 8:21).