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PROGRAM W-1798 – Part II
I have touched on several categories of walking wounded who are all around us—in our churches, on our jobs, next door neighbors, and even in our families. I’m hoping that by talking about these walking wounded, it will cause all of us to be more sensitized to their hurt, and to make sure we don’t hold judgmental attitudes toward them, or take them lightly.
There’s one other category of walking wounded that I want to talk about—those who have been caught in the sin of homosexuality. The Bible is abundantly clear in its stance on the perversion of sex. There’s no way that we can or should ever soften our view on the fact that homosexuality is a sin. If you believe that the Bible is God’s inspired Word, then that is a fact you can’t dismiss.
But, dear friends, there are Christians who have been bound by that sin and they are walking wounded. Perhaps God has delivered them from the participation in that lifestyle, but nonetheless it’s a part of their past. Perhaps they no longer practice homosexuality, but they’re still struggling with the desire. Think of a Christian who is in some stage of recovery: What kinds of remarks and attitudes is that walking wounded person likely to hear in some Christian settings?
They might hear Christians talking about them with anything but compassion. Perhaps they’ve heard sermons or read things that have led them to believe that we don’t just condemn the sin, we condemn them also. One sin is no worse in God’s sight than any other—and none of us is without sin. Some sins have more consequences than others, but all sin is rebellion against God’s principles in some way or another.
Maybe, like me, you struggle with the sin of a critical spirit. You can’t see my critical spirit; it’s not immediately obvious, right? But it’s there underneath, and God sees it as just as sinful as any other sin. People, however, tend to have different yardsticks for different sins—God doesn’t.
Jesus set a wonderful example of how to deal with walking wounded and I’d like to look at how he handled it. First, think of how he dealt with the Samaritan woman at the well. He begins his interaction with her by asking something of her: “Give me a drink?” (John 4:7, NASB)
By speaking to her, he broke all tradition; men did not normally speak to women in public and Jews did not ever speak to a Samaritan. She comes back with a rather curt and sarcastic reply. Can’t you hear her say, “How is it that you, being a Jew, ask me for a drink since I am a Samaritan woman?” (John 4:9, NASB)
I can imagine she had her guard up; she was a walking wounded person, unacceptable in her society because of her many marriages and the fact that she is now living with a man who is not her husband. She’s been hurt so often by men that she probably has a strong distrust of all of them, and yet she is obviously in great need of love and kindness. Thus, her first reaction to Jesus was not very courteous.
Walking wounded may indeed do that. It’s a defense mechanism to keep people from inflicting further pain. Jesus understands her completely and he answers her very gently: “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you ‘Give me a drink’, you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water” (John 4:10, NASB).
Jesus is always gentle with the walking wounded. He describes himself as gentle and lowly of heart. This gentleness is not weakness or softness on sin. Proverbs 15:1 tells us that “A gentle answers turns away wrath. . .” (NASB). and Jesus was the best ever at using gentle words to deal with the walking wounded.
Once she hears his gentle words, she starts to change in her attitude toward him. She calls him “Sir.” Then he engages her in a marvelous conversation where he shares with her the greatest truth ever—that he is the Messiah, he is God made man, and he has come to salvage walking wounded just like her.
Do you remember how he uncovered her sinful past and lifestyle? Ever so gently he probed until she confessed her past. He didn’t have to tell her it was wrong for her to live in sin with this current lover. All he said was, “You have correctly said, ‘I have no husband’; for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly” (John 4:17-18, NASB).
Obviously, Jesus cannot ignore the sin, but in dealing with this dreadfully wounded person, he is so careful not to add further condemnation. He simply allows her to be able to face the horrible reality of who she was. And then he came with marvelous antiseptic—the healing water of life which he gave to her freely.
His gentleness is evident in the way he dealt with the woman caught in adultery. First, he protects her from her accusers and gets rid of them. He knows she can never find healing with all the accusations being hurled at her and the threat of being stoned to death hanging over her head. He invites the one without sin to throw the first stone, and then he writes something on the ground which causes every one of her accusers to walk away.
Once they are alone, he doesn’t have to say a lot to her. He asks, “Did no one condemn you?” (John 8:10, NASB). Obviously, they have not. So Jesus says, “I do not condemn you either. Go. From now on sin no more” (John 8:11, NASB). What this sinful woman needed in order to be able to change and heal was not condemnation. Stoning her wasn’t the answer. All she needed was a caring and compassionate person who understood her and, instead of condemning her, brought her a healing ointment which would give her the ability to change.
Do you remember Jesus’ encounter with Zaccheus? This was a man with a notorious past, but Jesus found him and invited himself to dinner at his house. I love this story. It’s interesting to note how often Jesus uses a meal to talk with a walking wounded person. There’s something about breaking bread together which helps us relate and communicate, I think.
As Jesus was eating at Zaccheus’ house, we see this little short dynamite of a man confess his sinful past, commit to a changed life, and to restoration of the wrongs he has done. As far as we know, Jesus never said a word to Zaccheus about his sinful life; but his gentleness, his presence, his willingness to associate with him was all Zaccheus needed to have the courage and strength to confess and change.
Ever think of how Jesus dealt with Peter after the resurrection? Peter had dreadfully failed the Lord, and he must have been so terribly embarrassed to face Jesus again. But Jesus never said, “Peter, how could you have done what you did to me? How could you have denied me with curses?” No, Jesus knows that Peter is a walking wounded person—a person who undoubtedly feels he has made a fatal mistake from which he cannot recover. So Jesus gently talks with him and asks him, “Peter, do you love me?” (John 21:16, NIV).
Don’t you think Jesus was saying to Peter, “I know you’ve failed me, but if you truly love me, we still have a future together, Peter.” Jesus understood that you can fail a person you love, as Peter had failed him. Jesus wanted to restore Peter, not condemn him, so he brings loving ointment to Peter’s wounds so that the scab can form and the healing can take place. And it worked beautifully; the book of Acts tells of the mighty way in which Peter was used in the early church.
I tread very carefully here, because it would be so easy to be misunderstood. I do believe that Christians in leadership positions who betray the confidence of their followers by their conduct should forfeit their privilege of leadership. I know that God has a higher standard for those of us in leadership positions.
However, what about those where the wounds happened years ago before leadership positions, perhaps in many cases even before these people were born again? What about those whose wounds are caused in large part by the sins of others? What about those who have with all their hearts confessed and repented and they have a proven track record which shows they’ve done an about-face and are walking faithfully with the Lord? They often become casualties in Christian circles because someone or some organization has kept picking at their wounds, never allowing the healing to be final.
Now, I fully understand the principle of Scripture which teaches us that we reap what we sow. I fully accept the truth that we may indeed have to live with the consequences of our sins, even for a lifetime, though we’ve been forgiven by God and restored. But when a walking wounded person has been forgiven by God and knows that joy, they can handle the consequences if the people around them will just stop the scab-picking.
You see, Jesus never holds things over our heads. When he forgives, it’s total. The Bible teaches us that he forgets. This God who knows everything and has perfect memory chooses to forget our forgiven sins—to remember them against us no more. Is that incredible or what?!
When a walking wounded person comes to understand that forgiveness which Jesus offers, they can gradually heal from their wound. Oh, there may be some scar tissue which will never go away this side of heaven, but that won’t keep them from being effective for Jesus. That won’t mean that they must sit on a shelf, useless and rejected. They can keep on keepin’ on, if others will let their wounds heal and not pick at their scabs.
My dear friends, there aren’t any of us who don’t need forgiveness. There aren’t any of us who haven’t in some way messed up our lives. It’s just that some of us have done things which are more “acceptable” than others, or less visible. But in God’s sight, we’re all sinners, and we all desperately need God’s continual mercy and grace.
My parting Scripture verse, as I conclude these thoughts on how we should treat the walking wounded among us, comes from Colossians 3:12:
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
Put on compassionate hearts and become God’s channel of kindness and healing for the walking wounded in your life.