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Role models. I think we all recognize that the role models in our lives have had a great influence on us. Paul wrote to the Corinthians: Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1). That is the Bible’s definition of role modeling.
Maybe you’re thinking, “Well, sure, the Apostle Paul could say ‘Follow me as I follow Christ.’ After all, he was an apostle, and he was the best Christian who ever lived. But we could never be expected to seriously tell someone to follow us and do like we do, could we?”
Well, the answer is yes; every Christian should be that kind of a godly role model. I would imagine some of you have never thought of yourself as a role model or a leader. Maybe that’s because you’re still young, you are not an assertive person, or you don’t have leadership gifts. But all of us are role models, and there are people in your life whom you influence. Therefore, we all have a responsibility as believers to make sure we are godly role models.
I know that’s a tall assignment, but we who are born from above have the power of the Holy Spirit within us. We don’t have to do this on our own. God will enable us to become godly role models. However, I believe we do need to take our role modeling responsibilities seriously and consciously work at being better role models.
Godly role modeling is the natural result of a normal, growing walk with Jesus. In 2 Corinthians 3:18 we see that we are being transformed into the likeness of Jesus with ever-increasing glory. So, if our lives as believers are a continuing transformation, becoming more and more like Jesus, then we can also say, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”
We are responsible for the people we influence. That’s a sobering thought, isn’t it? We are responsible to set the best example of godly living we possibly can. We are not responsible for their behavior; they still have a free will to choose to follow our example or not. But if we do not give them the role model we should, we will be held accountable to God for our failure to be a good example.
So, the first thing I would recommend is that you make a list of the people in your life over whom you have some influence. That will help you become more intentional about being a good role model. Then add to that list the names of others that you would like to influence.
If you’re a parent, your children’s names will be at the top of the list. If you’re married, your mate’s name is likely to be on that list. Your co-workers are people over whom you have influence. If you’re a manager or business owner, the people who work for you definitely will be on that list. Your close friends are within your sphere of influence; other family members will be there. If you have any leadership roles in your church or other organizations, such as a teacher, you’ve got a list of people there for whom you are a role model.
Write those names down. You’ll be surprised how wide your influence spreads. After you’ve made a list of the people in your life whom you influence or who you would like to influence in a godly way, then you want to consider some key areas where you need to set the right example.
When Paul told the Corinthians to follow his example, he said, “Do not cause anyone to stumble. . .” (1 Corinthians 10:32). That’s a good place to start when we think of our influence as role models.
Who could you cause to stumble? In Romans 14 Paul tells us to be careful with someone whose faith is weak. Do you know any new believers? Those are people who look to us more mature Christians as role models. We could cause them to stumble by gossiping or by our lack of a servant attitude, to name just two. With new believers we have a heavy responsibility to exemplify a godly lifestyle so they have a clear model of what a Christian’s life should be.
If you’re a parent, you could cause your children to stumble. One of the most common ways we can fail our children is to live an inconsistent life. If our walk doesn’t match our talk, if we’re one way at church or with others and a different way at home, our children will see that hypocrisy, and it will have a great adverse effect on their lives.
One of the greatest blessings in my life was my parents. Yes, they took me to church regularly, but more importantly, I saw them live out their faith in our home on a daily basis. They were the same people at home as everywhere else, and their godly role modeling has had an inestimable positive effect on my life and my brothers as well. They did not cause me to stumble through a hypocritical lifestyle.
For those who go out to a job each day, there are people on that job who look at you as a role model. Maybe you have a new co-worker who is looking to you for training or help as he or she begins. You are a role model to that person. Your work habits and your work attitude will set a standard for that new employee. If you’re never on time for work, why should they be? If you bad mouth the boss, they will too. But if you are a diligent worker and you show a godly attitude toward the boss and the job, that new coworker will be more likely to conform his or her behavior to yours, since you’re the senior person on the job.
Anyone who has a position of leadership is always role modeling, whether you like it or not. I often remind managers that if you want to be a good manager, you don’t have the luxury of being in a bad mood because if you’re in a bad mood, everyone who works for you will be in a bad mood before the day is over. That’s because as a leader, you are a role model, and your attitude is very contagious.
Ask yourself this question: How do you react to stress and crises on the job? Do you go into gripe mode? Do you exhibit a bad attitude? Do you overreact? If so, you are setting that example for your co-workers, your employees, even for your management.
One way to evaluate your effectiveness as a role model on your job is to ask yourself: If everyone else in the company was like me, worked as hard as I do, was as loyal as I am, managed their time like I do, went the extra mile as much as I do, had the same attitude I have, would we have a better company? A godly role model on the job will raise the performance standards for everyone they influence.
Isn’t that an exciting prospect? Regardless of who you are or what position you have in the company, even if you’re in an entry level position, you can have a positive impact on the company’s success, the company’s morale, the company’s profitability by simply being a positive, godly role model. You will raise the bar so that others will want to jump higher and do better.
Way back in the early church the Apostle Paul understood the importance of good role modeling. He wrote:
For you yourselves know how you ought to follow our example. . . . we worked night and day, laboring and toiling so that we would not be a burden to any of you. We did this, not because we do not have the right to such help, but in order to make ourselves a model for you to follow. (2 Thessalonians 3:7-9)
Now, consider what this teaches us. Paul inconvenienced himself in order to establish a strong model for the Thessalonian church to follow. In other words, being a godly role model for those under his influence was a very high priority for Paul, something he consciously made an effort to do even though it increased his workload.
If we are to be godly role models – good leaders, we’ll have to go out of our way and inconvenience ourselves at times. It will take effort and sometimes sacrifice. You may be thinking, “Well, I think I’ll just skip it then.” But you see, we don’t have a choice about whether we’ll be a role model or not; we only have a choice about whether we’ll be a godly role model or not. Everyone is somebody’s role model.
Role modeling is both a privilege and a responsibility. It’s a privilege because it allows us to influence others in a godly direction, and that has eternal significance–it really matters. If you’re looking for something to do that is meaningful, becoming a godly role model sure fills that bill. It makes a difference that matters for eternity, and that is a great privilege.
But also consider the responsibility of being a role model. For example, you can lecture your children until you’re blue in the face about never telling a lie, but if they hear you slanting the truth, you’ve lost your credibility. On the other hand, if they observe that you read your Bible and pray on a daily basis, they’ll be much more likely to do so as well. More than anyone else in your life, your children will learn from your example far more than they will learn from your words.
So, becoming a godly role model requires a close daily walk with the Lord, a humble spirit, and lots of dependence upon his power in us. It is a responsibility, but please, don’t lose sight of the great privilege you have to be a godly role model.
Not long ago a good friend of mine changed jobs and as she began her new job, she did what she always does: She worked hard and gave her employer a good day’s work for her pay. However, the people who worked in her department were not accustomed to that kind of work ethic. Indeed, they had all developed some very bad work habits and were quite lazy.
As they observed my friend’s work ethic, some of them made comments on how she was going to make them look bad. But she quietly responded that she just had to do her work diligently because that was the right thing to do, and she kept on working hard every day. Soon she noticed that the other employees started doing their jobs better, and they developed much better work habits simply because my friend had role modeled what a good worker should do.
She wasn’t their manager; in fact, she was low man on the totem pole as the new employee. But she role modeled what she believed God would have her do as an employee and that has changed the morale and the work habits of her department. That’s an example of what it means to be a godly role model.
To give you a different kind of story, several years ago I was asked to do some training for a large company in New Jersey. The manager in charge was very intent on improving his employees’ telephone skills, and he insisted that they use a friendlier telephone greeting. But he would answer his phone in an abrupt manner using only his last name. I suggested that if he would change his telephone habits, it would have a very favorable impression on his workers, and they’d be more likely to change. He laughed and said, “Oh, Mary, I’ve been answering the phone this way for 25 years; I’m not likely to change now.”
Well, I knew my training efforts would have limited success because those workers would be more influenced by their boss’s role model than they would by my training session.
So, whether you’re a worker, a manager, a business owner, a low person on the ladder, or at the top, you have the privilege and the responsibility to be a godly role model. Don’t miss your opportunities.