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How are you doing in your relationships? Are they in good shape? The Bible gives us much good advice and guidance to help us with our relationships.
Romans 12:15 offers some very sound counsel for us. It says: Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Think about your relationships with your family, your friends, your coworkers, even your more casual acquaintances. Do you really rejoice with them when they rejoice and cry with them when they cry?
Have you ever been excited about telling a friend some good news, only to discover that they didn’t seem to find it exciting at all? I remember once my company advised me that I was to go to a special conference. I was thrilled at this good news, and immediately shared it with my friend, expecting her to be happy with me. Instead, my good news put her into a terrible bad mood; she didn’t speak to me for a quite awhile. You see, she wanted to go to the conference, too, so instead of rejoicing with me, she was angry at me.
I remember when a close friend was sharing a disappointment with a couple of us. We both just moaned and offered sympathy. “I’m so sorry; that’s really rotten. You’ve sure had nothing but bad news lately it seems.” Do you know how she responded? She said, “Yes, but I know the Lord has a purpose in all this and we’ll be okay.”
When a fellow believer has a grief or disappointment of some kind, don’t give them cliches or advice. Don’t even quote Romans 8:28 to them. Just mourn with them. That’s what they need right then. And when you mourn with them, they can then quote Romans 8:28; they will be the one to tell you that they know God is still in control. However, if you say things like: “Now, don’t let this get you down. You know that God still loves you and will take care of you,” it somehow makes them want to say, “But it hurts. Don’t you understand? It hurts.”
A good way to improve your relationships is to just learn to rejoice at other’s good news with them. Enhance their happiness by sharing their excitement. And when they’re in the depths of despair, just cry with them, give them sympathy and love, without any advice. That’s good biblical counsel.