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PROGRAM D-7294
Do you approach your relationships as a host or a guest? We’ve been looking at how we can improve our ability to connect with others. And the attitude that helps is to think of yourself as the host or hostess rather than the guest. Or, in more biblical terms, as one who serves rather than one who is served.
Think about your daily interactions with other people—at work, at home or church, wherever. Are you a host or a guest? For example, do you initiate the phone call that needs to be made or do you wait for the other person to call? When you’re in a group, do you introduce yourself to someone new or wait for them to introduce themselves first? When someone seems puzzled or confused, do you offer to help?
Maybe you’re thinking that you can’t be the host or hostess because you’re shy or introverted. I want to encourage you to give it a try. It may take you out of your comfort zone temporarily, but once you take that first step to “host” your relationships, you’ll see that it really isn’t that scary, and before long you will be comfortable doing it. It will surprise you to see the positive reactions you receive and you’ll feel very good about connecting with others in more meaningful ways.
One of the reasons we hesitate to take the role of host or hostess in relationships is because we fear what others will think of us. I find that when I am more concerned about how I will appear to others than I am about trying to connect with them, it’s because I am far too self-focused. I have to stop and remind myself that it’s not all about me. I can assure you that if you reach out to others in an attempt to connect in a better, more loving way, you will rarely make a fool of yourself. And so what if you do? Does the world stop revolving? Does God stop loving you? We just have to get over our intense self-absorption.
Another obstacle to connecting with others is our pride. How often do you hesitate to initiate a connection with someone new because you feel they should make the first move? If you find yourself thinking, “They should come to me,” it could be the indication of a proud attitude.
Or maybe some of us hesitate to connect with others because it just takes too much effort. True, it does take effort and time, but the fruit of that effort is very rewarding.
I hope you’ll consider your responsibility to be a host or hostess with the people in your life, rather than playing the role of the guest. It makes life so much richer and fulfills our God-given responsibility to do unto others as we would want them to do to us.