For the most part, we live in a very ungrateful world. All around you can see examples of children being ungrateful for all their parents have done for them; workers not appreciating their jobs; Americans not appreciating the country they live in. Thankfulness seems to be in short supply.
For many people, gratitude is difficult because life is difficult. For others, gratitude is just not on their radar screens. Life is all about them, and they think they deserve whatever good comes to them, so being thankful just doesn’t fit in their attitudes. And others are not thankful because they simply take for granted the good things in their lives. They just simply never stop to say thanks.
Do you remember this story from Luke 17:11-19?
Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”
When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed.
One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.
Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.”
We read that story and we shake our heads at those nine guys who never said thanks. What’s the matter with them? Jesus healed them of this horrible disease and they don’t even bother to return and express their gratitude? And note that Jesus finds it pretty baffling, too. “Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?”, he asks. Just one guy, and he wasn’t even a fellow Jew.
Why did nine go away without saying thanks? We aren’t told exactly why, but I can imagine that they were so excited to be healed of leprosy that instead of thanking Jesus, they rushed right back into their lives, telling their families that they were healed, and picking up where they left off before that dreaded disease. It was all about them and the good news that they were healed. They just didn’t take the time or the effort to say thanks. They did not choose to be thankful.
You see, being thankful and expressing it are choices that you and I make each day. Rarely does a day pass that doesn’t offer you at least one thankful moment. But I wonder, how many of your days—and mine—begin and end without one word of thankfulness coming from your lips? Jesus said “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Luke 6:45). If our lips are not speaking words of thanksgiving, it’s because our hearts are not full of thankfulness. We speak what is in our hearts.
So, my challenge to you is that you make a decision that you are going to choose thankfulness and you’re going to do so every day. If you are a Christ-follower, that should be a no-brainer decision, because it is simply obeying the principles set down in God’s Word. Here are four examples, and there are many more:
Colossians 2:6-7: So, then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.
Ephesians 5:19 -20: Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ
1 Thessalonians 5:18: Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
Psalm 100:4: Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.
So, I think we have to conclude that when we are truly ungrateful, either because life is hard, or we forget to be thankful, or we take our blessings for granted—whatever the reason may be—we are in disobedience, and that’s a sin. I know—we don’t think of it as sin, but the Bible says, “If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them” (James 4:17).
That should be enough motivation for us as Christ-followers to decide to choose thankfulness on a regular basis. But here’s more: There is evidence in studies done that people who choose to actively practice gratitude actually raise their own level of happiness. Researchers in a recent study randomly assigned one group of study participants to keep a short weekly list of the things they were grateful for, while another group listed hassles or even neutral events. After ten weeks the first group enjoyed significantly greater life satisfaction than the others.
These researchers explain that acting happy, regardless of feelings, coaxes one’s brain into processing positive emotions. Another research showed that gratitude stimulates the hypothalamus—a big word that defines the part of the brain that regulates stress, and also the area of our brains that produces the sensation of pleasure. Another study in 2011 demonstrated that when a person is shown gratitude, it affects their behavior. Angry people can be disarmed with a simple “thank you.”
Well, duh! The Bible has given us that bit of good news long ago. God’s principles for our lives are there to make our lives better. And so it is when we choose to be thankful.
I remember reading a book entitled Thank You Power: Making the Science of Gratitude Work for You. And it was written from the perspective that you should be a thankful person because people will like you better, it will have positive effects on your career pursuits, it will improve your relationships, and on and on. All of which is true. But our motivation as Christians should be at a much higher level: We should strive to be thankful people because we want to please our Savior. We should strive to be thankful people because we have so very much to be thankful for. We should strive to be thankful people because we want to represent Jesus well to the world around us.
But we must decide to choose thankfulness—it won’t just happen. And step one is to pray for a thankful heart. Pray that you will overflow with thankfulness. Take being a thankful person seriously—make it a goal. And then, put some disciplines in place that will help you remember to practice thankfulness.
Here are my suggestions for choosing thankfulness on a daily basis:
- Make the first thing you say each morning words of thanksgiving. If you live alone and there’s no one to talk to first thing, then talk out loud to yourself first thing, and say something you’re thankful for. If you are married or live with family, say words of thankfulness early on in your morning conversation. It could be as simple as “I’m so thankful for this beautiful day,” or even more powerful, “I’m really thankful for you.” Put a stick-it note on your mirror that says, “Say something thankful this morning,” just to remind you to do it. Now, that may sound hokey to you, but I’m totally convinced that most of us just don’t remember to speak words of gratitude. It’s a memory issue, so let’s help our memories along by simple reminders. And speaking words of gratitude early in the day gets your day started right. You know, your day is won or lost in the morning hours, so start with thanksgiving and see how it changes you and your day, and how positively it affects those around you.
- Use the thankful alphabet to remind you to be thankful. Just go through the ABC’s thinking of one thing per letter for which you’re thankful. You can do it by yourself or in a group. It’s fun, and it feeds your mind with positive reinforcement of all of God’s goodness to you. That changes how you think, which will change the way you talk, which will simply improve your attitude and your day significantly. It’s a great way to teach your children to be thankful—and you can do it as you ride in the car or eat dinner!
- Send one note of thanks to one person each day—or at least every other day. Just determine to say “Thanks” in a concrete way to someone. Ask God to bring people to your mind who deserve some gratitude—either for what they’ve done for you personally, or what they do for others, or just for who they are. It’s easy to do that now with email and texts and Facebook, etc. Takes little of your time, and it could be a huge encouragement to someone else.
- Turn every complaint into a praise. Just start paying attention to the times when you start to be negative, and stop in the middle of it and think of how you can turn it into a praise or a thanks. For example, you start to say, “I am so tired of the rain. . .” but you catch yourself in time and instead you say, “I am so thankful for rain. People in many other places would love to have this kind of rain.” And that, of course, is very true.
- Start every prayer with thanksgiving. Psalm 100:4 says: “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving and into his courts with praise.” That’s pretty simple, isn’t it? So, just do it.
- Be grateful for the small things you take for granted each day. Just breath interior prayers of thanksgiving for the smell of grass being mowed, the full moon that takes your breath away, the song you just heard which reminded you of happy days, the way your dog—or cat—loves you unconditionally, the taste of chocolate. There’s so much, and if you simply breathed interior prayers of thanksgiving throughout your days, I promise you, it would make a difference.
Now here’s the thing: We must choose thankfulness not only when we feel like it, but most especially, when we don’t feel like it. You need it then more than ever. Don’t let that old idea that it would be hypocritical or unauthentic to give thanks when you don’t feel thankful. That’s just an excuse. Rebel against your emotions and determine that you’re going to be thankful whether you feel like it or not!
Your emotions, by the way, are untrustworthy barometers, and if you allow them to dictate your behavior, you’ll be in tons of trouble in many areas. Your emotions must learn to be servants to your will—and your will—and mine—should be to do the will of God. And as we’ve seen, God wants you and me to choose thankfulness, actually to overflow with thankfulness. Why don’t we do this for all the good reasons there are: To make our own lives so much more blissful, to bless the people around us every day, to make Jesus look good to those who don’t yet know him as we do, but most importantly, in obedience to our Lord, and thereby showing him that we love him.